I May Be A Mediocre Mom on My Best Day, But My Kids Can’t Stop Smiling

I’m not a great mom, I’m average at best. I’m tired. I cut too many corners to win any type of parental award. I’m not your greatest example of what an ideal mom should look like. I don’t even want a “Mother of the Year” honor because I’m naturally not that person and I don’t feel bad about it either. Sometimes our life is a cluster with many moving parts and I’ve accepted this reality. I may be mediocre on my best day, but my kids are always smiling and their eyes dance. My kids won’t remember the fact that I never took home a Supermom trophy, but they will always remember how I made them feel. I’m happy, they’re happy. And to be honest, that’s all I really care about. You can place that coveted parent award on your mantel. Enjoy!

Sometimes I let let my kids eat dessert before dinner. After-all, it makes them feel special and rules are meant to be broken. My fondest childhood memories are when my parents threw rules out the window and let us be. I don’t make my kids eat foods they don’t like. There were times family members forced me to eat gross vegetables as a kid and I still have associated trauma. So no, I don’t do that. In fact, I’m sure my children are falling short of all the daily recommended vegetable and water servings. But they’ll live. Despite national studies that suggest otherwise, their iPads are their best friends and I support their extended use. Like I said, I’m tired as a motha.

We try to complete all homework assignments but often, life gets in the way and we turn stuff in late. This year was especially a doozy having to add “teaching and other classroom duties” to my professional resume. Do I look like I’ve been trained in teaching? I’m good at a lot of things, but it’s obvious that teaching isn’t one of them and I’m okay with that. I used to beat myself up, constantly falling short in e-learning goals and often disappointed in my newfound teaching abilities (or lack thereof). Especially when other parents seemed to be keeping up just fine. But I decided I wouldn’t go through life always trying to keep up with the Jones and stellar parents whose kids are winning special class projects left and right. That’s not me, and I’m not even faking it or jealous. Like I said, I’m tired.

I’m an individual that has personal needs, desires and goals outside of motherhood. If I’m not fed, I cannot feed my children. So I try really hard to balance their needs with my own. Sometimes I hit, sometimes I miss. Actually I miss a lot and I’m used to doing a lot of face-palms. I watch a lot of moms miserably go without to make things perfect for their kids. But that’s not me and I’m not going. What I won’t do is sell myself short in the process of motherhood because I matter too. It’s important to me that my children see me make myself a priority as well. In trying to balance my interest with theirs on a good day, some details get overlooked. A sis is tired.

I start my days energized, and end completely spent! I work full time, I parent full time, I have my hands in 1,000 things at once. My life doesn’t revolve around my kids and it shows. You won’t hear about me showing up to all the PTA meetings or crafting amazing child art fairs at home. My kids aren’t doing parent-inspired science fair poster or special assignments that will catapult them to the head of the class. On our best day, we are trying to complete missing math and past-due artwork because our lives just got crazy. On an average day, I’m just trying to keep my household clean and together without having a breakdown. Again, your girl is tired.

Most days, I often don’t now what I’m doing. I don’t know the answers to these complex parental conundrums, like “how to keep your young kids from sibling rivalry,” or “how teach your teenager about being a responsible adult.” It’s easier said than done and I surely don’t know what I’m doing on a consistent basis! Every day I have to deal with new parental experiences I’ve never seen before and I feel clueless. Sometimes I say the wrong things, some days I hit a home run. But given that no one ever handed me the blue-book on how to parent, I don’t get down in the dumps when I make a bad decision. Half of the time, I don’t know what the heck just happened, plus I’m tired. *Shrugs.*

But I one thing is for sure, I do show up each and every day. I wake up early with a renewed spirit and fresh energy to tackle motherhood. I start my day with new ideas on how to be better and learn from my previous parental failures. I don’t hold myself to high standards I’ll never be able to reach- I reach what I can and sleep peacefully at night knowing I’m at least a top nomination for the “Pretty Good Mom” award. (I’m going to be too salty if I don’t win at least that!) But one thing is for sure: I am present, my kids are always smiling, and I show up early and ready to work.